Pinch me, I think I’m dreaming.
I thought I saw a fire moving on water.
I thought I felt it move through me,
Blowing heat into the bones of my arms,
As the sun seals the sensation with a kiss.
--Susan sitting at Profile Lake in July 2008
My experiences when I’m in the White Mountains of New Hampshire are, often times, too odd for me to express. Profile Lake is one of the places where I have strongly felt the presence of God, where I feel I can fully open up, send out intentions, and have ‘answers’ come back to me. The ‘answers’ are not always straight-up, “Here’s how to solve this dilemma in your life” kind of ‘answers’. Usually, I’ll get a phrase, or an image, or the sensation as I felt it this last time. And then I’m free to now go, and do what I will with this new knowledge.
So what have I done in the past month since I had this experience? Well, I have been paying attention to my tears which have been many. As I noted before, I am not the type of woman who cries at everything. But lately, I have been finding the readings in the Daily Office to be so incredibly moving (and in the OT so incredibly bloody!) that I am often trying to catch myself before I dissolve into a sobbing, blubbering, mess. I’ve been reading in Acts how Peter….the one who denied Jesus three times, almost drowned when he tried to walk out on the water to Jesus….finds his power to profess that Jesus is the Messiah. Then Peter is able to heal people. This is really amazing stuff. It tells me that you have to keep plugging at getting past your fears…and once you do….you have the potential to be “the Rock”. But first, you have to have faith. And even the smallest amount of faith can grow into bush that will support the birds. Add to this the story of Jesus’ feeding the five thousand, and having leftovers, and I am astounded with the bounty of God’s love for everyone….if they just have faith and can believe.
Thanks be to God…and pass the Kleenex box please….