I Do! Um, Wait: Is That Allowed Here?

I do love the Episcopal Church, but--man--we can get our knickers twisted into knots better than any other Christian denomination in this country!

That was my conclusion after reading the report in the New York Times about the beginning of marriage equality in New York state this Sunday.  Six dioceses.  Six bishops.  And at least three different approaches to answering the "pastoral genorosity for LGBT couples" afforded to them from the 2009 General Convention.  

Under the rules of the Church, what constitutes a marriage and who gets to preside and what they get to do are governed not only by Church law but the law of the state.  In those jurisdictions such as New York, where LGBT couples will be granted the civil right to marry, the General Convention has given leeway for the bishop to instruct priests on how to handle a marriage that is not "one man and one woman."  

And that's when we get all Episcopalian on the matter!

Two bishops say the church, and its priests, are in the free and clear to hold ceremonies.  One says that the priest may bless the couple, but a civil authority must marry them... and this can not occur in the church.  Another says, "Hell No!" to all of it.  And at least two others are staying out of the discussion and maybe hoping that it will all go away after next year's General Convention.

Complicating matters even further is the requirement that non-celibate priests of any orientation better get married, or they better live apart from the love of their life.   For the Bishop of Long Island, that seemed a pretty clear directive to his partnered-priests that once it became legal to tie-the-knot, it was time to grow up and go to the altar just like their straight brothers and sisters.   So, what does it mean if a priest must marry his or her partner, but then there are all these caveats as to whether it can happen inside the church and performed by a fellow priest? 

Bishop of New York, Mark Sisk, has been a proponent of marriage equality.  But now that equality is becoming a reality, he faces the difficulty of discerning what "generous pastoral response" in light of current Church canon law really means.  Of the six, Bishop Sisk is the one trying to find the via media on the issue.  For that, he wins the "Very Episcopalian" prize.  

Lots of LGBT Episcopalians in New York City are sympathetic to Sisk's position.  They know he is trying to move at a pace that is going to hold the tension between the virulent anti-gay Anglicans and the equally strong opinioned Episcopalians from blowing the whole thing up.   But I guess I see all of this as adding more dirt to the mountain that was a mole hill.

Short of all gay LGBT Episcopalians agreeing to commit mass suicide, those who have been attempting to shred the Episcopal Church with their stampede off to affiliate with Uganda and such will never be satisfied.  And I think even if we did all kill ourselves, they'd still find something wrong with the Episcopal Church.   That's why I find all the hand-wringing and painfully cautious steps toward full inclusion to be just that: painful.  I would love to do research to see if the Church spent this much energy parsing out the particulars in the case of an interracial marriage.  Or better yet: an interfaith marriage.  I would hope that there was as much debate in the Episcopal Church over whether a priest may officiate or even be present at the marriage of an Episcopalian to a Jew.  I would expect to have this much wrangling over how to craft appropriate, separate language for such a wedding, one in which the name Jesus Christ would likely need to be left out of the mix.  And don't even think about a Holy Trinity.  And while all that glass stomping is festive, do NOT break the glasses for the martinis!

As always, I close my eyes and pray with a chuckle that we will all eventually reach that place where this whole episode in human history is behind us, and the church catches up with the state.  

Mazel tov, New York!

A Fitting End of the Year Statement

From today's Daily Office, there was one line that seemed to jump off the page from the Third Letter of John:

Beloved, do not imitate what is evil but imitate what is good. Whoever does good is from God; whoever does evil has not seen God.--3 John: 11

This exhortation seems the most fitting statement for where I am in my thinking at the close of 2009. This has year has sped by, and in the process, there have been some ups and downs and big bumps in the road. In reflecting on all-things-queer, I remember how deeply stung I felt about the results of the November 2008 election, especially how supposed friends in the straight community could not understand the depth and breadth of pain Florida LGBT people were feeling. My "otherness" had been made very clear... and I entered the year with bitter anger, resentment and feeling numb on some level. What a set up for Lent when I realized that the "thing" I needed to work on was my hardness of heart. And, just as it always seems to happen with me, I served as a Eucharistic Minister the Thursday after Ash Wednesday... and there in the Prayers of the People at the top of page 391:

For this congregation... that we may be delivered from
hardness of heart, and show forth your glory in all that we
do, we pray to you, O Lord.

I can say with certainty that I did not do well with this Lenten discipline because I could not shake that feeling that my "otherness" was being used against me and my fellow "others".

But if there is one thing I think I'm learning about God it's that God doesn't restrict God's work to a season, and won't be held hostage by our human attempts to keep God locked into "seasons". And so this summer, this glorious summer, I was encouraged in Tim Miller's performance workshop to explore my felt "otherness" of queer Christian by pulling the narration of my story out of my body through physical movement, as opposed to simply writing like a mad woman at a computer. The short monologue I developed feels like the seedling for a much bigger piece... if I will make the time to let the sun shine on it and help it to grow.

God also ended the winter season of discontent by blowing life into the actions of our General Convention in Anaheim. Because of the passage of D025 and C056, LGBT Episcopalians could rejoice and be glad in the thought that our "otherness" would not ban our queer priests from becoming bishops, and in those places with marriage equality, Episcopal bishops were now free to develop and work with clergy on rites that could celebrate a same-sex marriage. Hallelujah!

Sadly, winter hangs on in the South in ways that it doesn't normally in nature. And yet, even with bishops in our region stamping their feet and declaring that "nothing has changed", I am deeply aware that things are changing, and no amount of human intervention is going to stop it from changing. Because the good shepherd is aware that one of the sheep was allowed... even encouraged... to wander away from the flock, and the shepherd is not going to stop searching for that sheep, and will brave the wolves and the lions to keep calling out to the lost and lonely one that was told by the liars to go away. And with the election of more and more bishops in this country who recognize that Christ died for ALL people, the icicles are starting to drip.

Of course, there is still Uganda. Burundi. Rwanda. Malawi. Nigeria. The Anglican Covenant. Maine. New York. New Jersey. California. Yes, all of these are painful. All of them have felt like set backs. But there was also Iowa, Vermont, New Hampshire, Argentina, Mexico City, Washington, DC and State. In those moments when I pause and look at the creche set up on our mantle piece, or the Advent and Christmas candles beside it, I am reminded that nothing about God is necessarily easy. That wasn't the promise. The promise was that God has come, and will be with us always no matter what the circumstances. The light will pierce the darkness, and it prevails with each of us carrying that light inside us out into the world.

Beloved, do not imitate what is evil but imitate what is good.

Happy New Year!

When in Doubt, Look at the Psalms

I direct your attention to Psalm 146, which begins...

Hallelujah!
Praise the Lord, O my soul!
I will praise the Lord as long as I live;
I will sing praises to my God while I have my being.

Put not your trust in rulers, nor in any child of earth,
for there is no help in them.

When they breathe their last, they return to earth,
and in that day their thoughts perish.

This is indeed true. And a very important truth that I return to when I contemplate the state of the Church and the world. Besides the Pope's plan to reinvigorate the Borg-like qualities of Rome ("You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile!"), there is the additional news out of Uganda about a new "final solution". The government, with backing from religious leaders, is proposing a law to make homosexuality a crime punishable by death.

Yes. Punishable by death.

And, as Elizabeth+ Kaeton on her blog "Telling Secrets" notes... there has been deafening silence from the leadership of the Episcopal Church and most notably the Archbishop of Canterbury, the guy who has been the first to serve up the LGBT faithful in hopes of holding together his crumbling Anglican Communion. This is the same ABC who will put out mealy-mouthed pronouncements that violence against the LGBT faithful is "bad"; HOWEVER they really are an icky bunch of people who are causing an awful lot of heartache, aren't they?

So, while some may be wondering and waiting for the leaders in Anglican world to say something about this troubling development in Uganda... I have long since lost any hope for human leaders to "get it". Even in our own country, in this state of Florida, governmental leaders think nothing of throwing LGBT people under the bus. And the Church stands silent, and this silence reads as tacit approval. At stewardship time, the Church is more than happy to take my "queer" money whether I'm celibate or not. But bless and honor my relationship? Never!

And so, where is there hope? Go back to the rest of Psalm 146:

Happy are they who have the God of Jacob for their help!
whose hope is in the Lord their God;

Who made heaven and earth, the seas, and all that is in them;
who keeps his promise for ever;

Who gives justice to those who are oppressed
and food to those who hunger.

The Lord sets the prisoners free;
the Lord opens the eyes of the blind;
the Lord lifts up those who are bowed down;

The Lord loves the righteous;
the Lord cares for the stranger;
he sustains the orphan and widow,
but frustrates the way of the wicked.

The Lord shall reign for ever,
your God, O Zion, throughout all generations.
Hallelujah!

Never mistake the machinations of the men and women who claim to be "authority" with the true authority. Never forget that those who were marked as Christ's own forever with our baptism are bound to him through the Eucharist. This is the free grace of God, who is always looking out for those who are "bowed down"... and "sets the prisoners free." This grace, this love, comes through Jesus Christ who is the author of our salvation, not some purple-shirted God-wanna-be.

Your God, O LGBT community, is the Lord who reigns for ever. Sing Hallelujah! And remember that he will always be with you until the end of the age!

Health Care and the Episcopal Church

Among the many "other" resolutions adopted at General Convention comes this extremely-relevant gem:

* FINAL VERSION - Concurred Resolution: D048
Title: Adoption of a "Single Payer" Universal Health Care Program
Topic:Health Care Committee: 09 - National and International Concerns
House of Initial Action: Deputies
Proposer: The Rev. Gary Commins

Resolved, the House of Bishops concurring, That the 76th Convention of the Episcopal Church urge passage of federal legislation establishing a "single payer" universal health care program which would provide health care coverage for all of the people of the United States; and be it further

Resolved, That the General Convention direct the Office of Government Relations to assess, negotiate, and deliberate the range of proposed federal health care policy options in the effort to reach the goal of universal health care coverage, and to pursue short-term, incremental, innovative, and creative approaches to universal health care until a "single payer" universal health care program is established; and be it further

Resolved, That the Episcopal Church shall work with other people of good will to finally and concretely realize the goal of universal health care coverage; and be it further

Resolved, That church members and the Office of Government Relations communicate the position of the Episcopal Church on this issue to the President and Members of Congress, and advocate passage of legislation consistent with this resolution.


In a word: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I realize that those of you out there with the good fortune of having private insurance or access to an HMO might find universal health care coverage to be the beginning of us all wearing Nehru jackets and carrying little red books with pictures of Mao, or Stalin, or Castro. Is this a form of socialism? Yes. But is it right? You betcha!

Why? Well, consider some of the facts as the Episcopal Church considered them when adopting this resolution.

• More than 47 million people in the U. S. are currently without health insurance, more than 75 million went without for some length of time within the last two years, and millions more have inadequate coverage or are at risk of losing coverage.
• People of color, immigrants and women are denied care at disproportionate rates, while the elderly and many others must choose between necessities and life sustaining drugs and care. Unorganized workers have either no or inadequate coverage.
• The Institute of Medicine has found that each year more than 18,000 in the U. S. die because they had no health insurance.While we in the United States spend more than twice as much of our gross domestic product as other developed nations on health care ($7,129 per capita), we remain the only industrialized country without universal coverage, and the United States performs poorly in comparison on major health indicators such as life expectancy, infant mortality and immunization rates.
• Almost one-third (31 percent) of the money spent on health care in the United States goes to administrative costs.
• The potential savings on paperwork, more than $350 billion per year, are enough to provide comprehensive coverage to everyone without paying any more than we already do.

I have heard people screaming that patients would not be able to see the doctor of their choice, and wouldn't be able to get necessary treatment quickly. Again, I say, how is this different than our current system where doctors, specialists, therapists have to be "in network" or a member of that "HMO group" in order for you to see them and have your health insurance cover the cost.

Under a universal health care plan, everyone would get paid: the hospital, the doctor, the specialist. The difference is that payment would be made on a fee-for-service that is negotiated to cover the cost of the care. For the practitioner, this is similar to what we're being paid right now by the 'lovely' insurance companies that will only cover 60-percent of what we've charged. That other 40-percent goes toward the private companies "operating costs" (read: their pockets). Why must they withhold 40-percent, when the patient is already paying money to the company... to the tune of $250-$600 a month... to have health insurance to begin with?!
If everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY, could have access to health care so we can begin to prevent preventable diseases and care for people... I'm willing to take a fee-for-service negotiated rate.

Under universal health care, there would be a global budget for hospital operating expenses. Regional health planning boards would manage and approve expensive equipment purchases.

Who loses in this plan? Private insurance companies. They would go bye-bye because nobody would be making a profit on other people's pain.

Who wins? Everybody... especially those everybody's who currently face a significantly- shortened life span because they can not afford to seek medical treatment.

What does this have to do with the Church: Everything!

The call to us from God always and everywhere is to see God's presence in the world. And where there is a need... as there is so clearly one in the instance of health care... it is our mission to remove stumbling blocks, support the weak, help the sick. Instead of always asking, "What would Jesus do?"... we need to go about the business of doing it!

Shut up and Let the Women Do the Talking!

Sometimes, I just have to step aside and allow another blogger to take the ball and run with it. And this commentary by DESERT CHILD author Katie Sherrod definitely is a good one. I think she may have the solution to the MAN-made crisis of a potential split in the Anglican Communion!
And don't worry, guys: you don't lose anything in her proposal... except your right to keep flapping your gums about "those resolutions" from General Convention.

On This Day in History...

How interesting that at a time when we have huffing and puffing about the actions taken at General Convention 2009 to include all people in the all the sacraments... the Episcopal Church marks 35 years of ordaining women to the priesthood. It was another time in the history of TEC when actions taken led to much gnashing of teeth and wailing in the wilderness.

Now, we are living through the same sort of nonsense with the Archbishop of Canterbury posing a "two tier" Anglican Communion to appease those who can not accept that in the United States, queers are among the baptized in the pews and could likely be called by God to move from the pew to the pulpit.

Rev. Susan Russell at AN INCH AT A TIME has an excellent retrospective in light of current events.

On that "Chosen Lifestyle"

As the dust continues to settle from General Convention 2009, along comes the Archbishop of Canterbury to go kicking it up again with his rather lengthy, numerated missive titled: "Communion, Covenant and our Anglican Future". A good two-thirds of this "pastoral" letter is dedicated to the two resolutions, D025 and C056, that won overwhelming votes of support from both the House of Deputies and the House of Bishops in Anaheim. These were the "controversial" resolutions; y'know the gay ones.

And... just to make sure he stirs up the most dust possible... his choice of words about "chosen lifestyle" highlight his complete and utter cluelessness about me and the other "others" in the Anglican Communion. His letter reads in part:

5. In response, it needs to be made absolutely clear that, on the basis of repeated statements at the highest levels of the Communion's life, no Anglican has any business reinforcing prejudice against LGBT people, questioning their human dignity and civil liberties or their place within the Body of Christ. Our overall record as a Communion has not been consistent in this respect and this needs to be acknowledged with penitence.
6. However, the issue is not simply about civil liberties or human dignity or even about pastoral sensitivity to the freedom of individual Christians to form their consciences on this matter. It is about whether the Church is free to recognise same-sex unions by means of public blessings that are seen as being, at the very least, analogous to Christian marriage.
7. In the light of the way in which the Church has consistently read the Bible for the last two thousand years, it is clear that a positive answer to this question would have to be based on the most painstaking biblical exegesis and on a wide acceptance of the results within the Communion, with due account taken of the teachings of ecumenical partners also. A major change naturally needs a strong level of consensus and solid theological grounding.
8. This is not our situation in the Communion. Thus a blessing for a same-sex union cannot have the authority of the Church Catholic, or even of the Communion as a whole. And if this is the case, a person living in such a union is in the same case as a heterosexual person living in a sexual relationship outside the marriage bond; whatever the human respect and pastoral sensitivity such persons must be given, their chosen lifestyle is not one that the Church's teaching sanctions, and thus it is hard to see how they can act in the necessarily representative role that the ordained ministry, especially the episcopate, requires.
9. In other words, the question is not a simple one of human rights or human dignity. It is that a certain choice of lifestyle has certain consequences. So long as the Church Catholic, or even the Communion as a whole does not bless same-sex unions, a person living in such a union cannot without serious incongruity have a representative function in a Church whose public teaching is at odds with their lifestyle. (There is also an unavoidable difficulty over whether someone belonging to a local church in which practice has been changed in respect of same-sex unions is able to represent the Communion's voice and perspective in, for example, international ecumenical encounters.)

Let me respond by simply stating that I have never, never, ever chosen to be a lesbian. I would not ever chose ON PURPOSE to be stared at in bars, refused service in a restaurant, denied a job promotion, or otherwise be treated with less dignity than is afforded anyone else. Choosing to where a T-shirt instead of an oxford to work is a "lifestyle" choice. Choosing to drink coffee instead of tea in the morning is a "lifestyle" choice. Having sexual and affectional desire for a member of the same-sex is a "sexual orientation."

So, what in the world could he mean by "chosen lifestyle"? I think that comes clear in his explanation about why he is opposed to ever blessing same-sex unions. Because same-sex couples might be engaging in same-sex sex. This seems to be the "choice" that would have "certain consequences." Those consequences being that no sexually-active LGBT person should be allowed to "go behind the curtain" and become a deacon, priest or bishop. And, what if the civil authorities have already determined that same-sex marriages are legal? Well, ++Rowan has an answer for that, too! "Since when do we let matters of 'the world' influence 'the Church'?"

Of course, he also acknowledges that violence committed against LGBT people in the name of the Church is wrong and abhorrent and the Church should apologize for such actions (Nigeria! Uganda!). But when does the Archbishop recognize that the tortured language of his letter is yet another form of violence against gay people in the Church? No, he's not physically attacking me. But he is bolstering the bigotry that's out there that says I am a second-class citizen and should be treated as such.

One can take solace in the fact that the Archbishop resides in jolly ol' England... and what he says or does is not binding on The Episcopal Church. At least I hope not!

One can also take solace that God is watching, and notes the prayers of those who truly turn to him:

You have kept count of my tossings;
put my tears in your bottle.
Are they not in your record?
--Psalm 56

Where Does His Faith Lie?

"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your gentleness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."--Phil. 4: 4-7

I have to wonder: if the bishop of Florida attended a noon day eucharist yesterday, these are the words he would have heard. My question is: would he really hear them? Does he hear the invitation not to worry?

Information about, and observation of, this bishop and his "pastoral letter" to the diocese have made me concerned for the man. His "fearing" for the state of the Anglican Communion seems grounded in a deeper "fear" of those who he thinks of as "other". From his letter, it is clear that he believes the only people fit for ministry in the Church are "married heterosexuals" or "chaste heterosexuals". LGBT Episcopalians are not even on his radar; afterall:

We Florida Episcopalians have agreed that we can live with these differences and we have long since concluded that debate over human sexuality will not be allowed to further divide us or to distract us from the important work which God has called us to do.

This would indicate that we have had a "deep listening process" in the diocese of Florida on these matters. I guess I must have missed it. I believe the time has passed for many of us to have such a process because we've already gone through the pain of schism. Those who didn't care to listen have left. Those who have stayed don't really talk about "it". But I have heard repeatedly from people within this diocese that if a person of "otherness" on the human sexuality scale were to approach the bishop about ordination, for example, the response would be one of "gracious restraint." Why? Not for reasons of theology, but for reasons of human sexuality. Because such a "manner of life" seems to pose a problem. How very sad.

In a previous entry, "Remaining Hopeful, Part Three", I talked of needing to find a way to pray for the bishop of this diocese. And I continue to do so, and hope that many other people will continue to recognize Bishop Howard as among the fearful who, because of their fear, can not and will not rejoice and be glad in the work of General Convention 2009. They fail to see that, in ways I think we should all see and make us pause in awe, the outcomes of this convention surpassed many of us in our understanding of what was going to happen. In many ways, the words of Isaiah 55 apply:

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord."

I believe this is true. The actions taken at this GC were "of God" and were not the ways of human manipulation and politicking.

So, then, if that's true: where does the bishop's faith lie?

An Excellent Commentary

Going about my business of reading what other bloggers are saying in the "wrap up" on the General Convention in Anaheim, I came across this piece published in the English newspaper The Guardian. I think it is an excellent commentary and explanation about where we, the Episcopal Church, now stand. It's by Jim Naughton of the Diocese of Washington. Go check it out!

Remaining Hopeful, Part Three

Now the word of the Lord came to me saying,
‘Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
and before you were born I consecrated you;
I appointed you a prophet to the nations.’
Then I said, ‘Ah, Lord God! Truly I do not know how to speak, for I am only a boy.’
But the Lord said to me,
‘Do not say, “I am only a boy”;
for you shall go to all to whom I send you,
and you shall speak whatever I command you.
Do not be afraid of them,
for I am with you to deliver you,
says the Lord.’
Then the Lord put out his hand and touched my mouth; and the Lord said to me,
‘Now I have put my words in your mouth.
See, today I appoint you over nations and over kingdoms,
to pluck up and to pull down,
to destroy and to overthrow,
to build and to plant.’
--Jeremiah 1: 4-10

I LOVE when Scripture comes at the most opportune moments! This reading from Jeremiah was assigned for "William White Day" in the Episcopal Church. Huh? Who? William White, the very first Presiding Bishop of the Protestant Episcopal Church... now known as The Episcopal Church... and the chaplain of our Congress starting in 1777. He's credited with the creation of the governance structure of our church that exists to this day of a House of Bishops and a House of Deputies made up of clergy and laity. So, how appropriate to have had his Saint's Day at the conclusion of our 76th General Convention in Anaheim. The collect for his day includes this:

O Lord, who in a time of turmoil and confusion raised up your servant William White, and endowed him with wisdom, patience, and a reconciling temper, that he might lead your Church into ways of stability and peace: Hear our prayer, and give us wise and faithful leaders, that through their ministry your people may be blessed and your will be done.

I, for one, believe that God bestowed a good dose of William White's energy into this General Convention, leading our Bishops and Deputies to make moves toward reconcilliation with the LGBT faithful that I NEVER thought they would do. As I had to admit to one friend on Facebook, "OK, I will take a side of crow with that cake, please."

We, as a Church, have approved a process for allowing same-gender blessings in dioceses where it is allowed by law; have opened the possibility of another "gay bishop"; have affirmed that people who are transgender deserve the same respect and dignity of every human being as we state so boldly in our Baptismal Covenant; and passed resolutions as prophets to call on Congress to end DOMA*, pass ENDA, and allow immigration for the partners of LGBT Americans. With each day, with each piece of news, I kept wondering if someone was going to pinch me and tell me, "You're dreaming again!" But it all happened. It really did happen. Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel shall come to thee, O Israel!

And then I opened an email, and I was directed to the pastoral letter from Bishop John Howard on the Diocese of Florida website. It reads in part:

I and the majority of our Florida deputation did not vote in favor of the resolution, fearing that it would be given undue attention, fearing that it could be the occasion for further division in an already divided and hurting Church, and fearing, too, that it would be misinterpreted as saying things that it did not. I am already reading some who are saying that it has ended the resolution of Convention in 2006 when we said that we would exercise restraint in consenting to the consecration of bishops whose manner of life would be unacceptable to our Anglican Communion partners. This resolution does not end that resolve. Only the future can tell just who will and will not be put forward as candidates for the Episcopate or how the Church will deal with them.

I felt the air leaving the balloon. But I read on:

We Florida Episcopalians live under some rules regarding these matters(human sexuality): We will love, respect and care for all of God's people...we will respect the traditional Christian norms and understandings of human sexuality which call us to chastity or to monogamous Christian marriage in ordained ministry and in the blessing of sexual relationships. We will deal with all of these important matters prayerfully, with love, with dignity and in the way in which Jesus Christ has called us: Loving the Lord our God with all that we are and all that we possess and loving our neighbor as ourselves.

Balloon flat, and on the ground. As well as the tears rolling down my cheeks.

So, I had to pause. I had to reflect. And I had to ask for advice on "How do I pray for my Bishop?"

More pausing. More reflecting. First, acknowledge the pain I was feeling in having read these words which seemigly dismiss D025 and the other resolutions as "irrelevant". Second, recall my own Lenten practice of asking God to help me with the hardness in my heart. And then remembering that phrase from the previous Lent: "Fast on fear, and feast on faith" and realizing that, in one sentence of his pastoral letter, the Bishop used the term "fearing" three times. So, my starting point in prayer was to ask God to soften his heart and lift the burden of fear from him.

My mentor suggested I take that same idea a step further, and imagine one of my worst fears... such as being told that I will be tossed into a deep lake... because that's where everybody else is going. (Note: since I am not a good swimmer, this would be quite frightening!) In other words, put myself in his place... real or imagined as it might be... but just know that this is where he is. I balked at first. But then I tried it on in my body. And I realized an important factor in how I venture into "deep lakes".

I don't go in alone.

I always make sure the people with me know that I am, at best, a crappy swimmer, and please don't try to surprise me or "dunk me" or do anything to me that might make me panic. I am careful, and usually go in slowly, but eventually I will be in the water, and may even dip my head under the water quickly. And while I may never fully relax in the water, I am also enjoying it and realizing that I have support in case I should get into trouble.

I think, to return the metaphor back to the Bishop, the answer may lie in the need for me... and for all of us who are the more experienced and skilled swimmers in these particular waters, to assure the ones who are deathly afraid of drowning that we will be in the lake with them. We will watch out for them, and we promise that we know their fear; hence we won't start playing impish dunking games to panic them needlessly. It's OK. The water feels good, and once you've been in it, your body temperature will adjust and it won't feel so cold.

In other words, those of us who have felt "unheard" for so long know that place of hurt and fear. And even when we were in that place, we still stayed in that particular lake, swimming as best we could under the circumstances. So we, of all people, are the ones who will make sure nobody drowns. It is the Christian thing to do.

God calms and controls the waters of chaos. And God is alive and well and working God's purpose out with what has happened in Anaheim... just as at other conventions and Lambeth conferences. I'm reminded of the passages of how the weak and the strong must be there for one another. We all, at one time or another, will face that feeling that we're in a place of weakness when we're in the minority. But, speaking as one of those made strong by the resolutions in Anaheim, I will support the weak with my offer to not let you drown. Just dip a toe into the water.
I am with you. And so is God.

*UPDATE: just read through Intergrity's listserve that the resolution on DOMA passed the House of Deputies but then went to the House of Bishops Executive Council. Still, this is amazing what they've done for LGBT Episcopalians.

While You Wait...

I don't have time to post my own thoughts at the moment, but I wanted to share this particular update from the Integrity folks via their IntegriTV. Much more from me later! I promise! :)

It's Like Easter... with Christmas, too!

I just don't know what to say any more.

The House of Bishops, on a 104 to 30 with 2 abstentions vote, have sent to the House of Deputies Resolution C056 dealing with blessing same-sex marriages. Here's the language:

Resolved, the House of Deputies concurring, That the 76th General Convention acknowledge the changing circumstances in the United States and in other nations, as legislation authorizing or forbidding marriage, civil unions or domestic partnerships for gay and lesbian persons is passed in various civil jurisdictions that call forth a renewed pastoral response from this Church, and for an open process for the consideration of theological and liturgical resources for the blessing of same gender relationships; and be it further
Resolved, That the Standing Commission on Liturgy and Music, in consulation with the House of Bishops, collect and develop theological, and liturgical resources and report to the 77th General Convention; and be it further
Resolved, That the Standing Commission on Liturgy and Music, in consulation with the House of Bishops, devise an open process for the conduct of its work inviting participation from provinces, dioceses, congregations, and individuals who are engaged in such theological work, and inviting theological reflection from throughout the Anglican Communion; and be it further
Resolved, That bishops, particularly those in dioceses within civil jurisdictions where same-gender marriage, civil unions, or domestic partnerships are legal, may provide generous pastoral response to meet the needs of members of this Church; and be it further
Resolved, That this Convention honor the theological diversity of this Church in regard to matters of human sexuality; and be it further
Resolved, That the members of this Church be encouraged to engage in this effort.

This is a step forward in the many steps toward blessing of same-sex marriages in the Episcopal Church. This will have no effect in jurisdictions, such as Florida, which has made it quite clear in its state constitution that gay people are not equal under the law.

The House of Deputies also has passed D012, in which the Church is taking a stand against discrimination aimed at transgender people. The resolution asks the Church to take the roll of the prophet by calling on elected officials to pass anti-discrimination measures protecting the transgender community.

It's amazing!

Remaining Hopeful, Part Two

"Moses was keeping the flock of his father-in-law Jethro, the priest of Midian; he led his flock beyond the wilderness, and came to Horeb, the mountain of God. There the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a flame of fire out of a bush; he looked, and the bush was blazing, yet it was not consumed. Then Moses said, ‘I must turn aside and look at this great sight, and see why the bush is not burned up.’ When the Lord saw that he had turned aside to see, God called to him out of the bush, ‘Moses, Moses!’ And he said, ‘Here I am.’ Then he said, ‘Come no closer! Remove the sandals from your feet, for the place on which you are standing is holy ground.’ He said further, ‘I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.’ And Moses hid his face, for he was afraid to look at God.
Then the Lord said, ‘I have observed the misery of my people who are in Egypt; I have heard their cry on account of their taskmasters. Indeed, I know their sufferings, and I have come down to deliver them from the Egyptians, and to bring them up out of that land to a good and broad land, a land flowing with milk and honey, to the country of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Amorites, the Perizzites, the Hivites, and the Jebusites. The cry of the Israelites has now come to me; I have also seen how the Egyptians oppress them. So come, I will send you to Pharaoh to bring my people, the Israelites, out of Egypt.’ But Moses said to God, ‘Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh, and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?’ He said, ‘I will be with you; and this shall be the sign for you that it is I who sent you: when you have brought the people out of Egypt, you shall worship God on this mountain.’" –Exodus 3:1-12

It was by chance of friendship (or perhaps it was the doing of the Divine) that I read this passage about the burning bush this morning. It’s actually the assigned passage for the noon-day eucharist for Wednesday, and hence was the jumping off point for a sermon by my mentor. Still, it seems like an appropriate read for a day when so many of us who are LGBT Episcopalians are feeling as though God has finally heard our cry for justice. There is no way to accurately articulate what it feels like to be gay in a country where the core of who you are, the very basic and intimate part of you, is constantly up for debate, and votes, and denials of all kinds by the majority. Believe me when I say I feel like an insect under a microscope every time another politician goes off on a rant about the ‘gay agenda’ or the media examines a question like, "Should same-sex marriages be legal?"
Knowing how crappy that is, it becomes compounded when an institution such as the Church decides to open its lens of scrutiny on my being. Suddenly, all those Scriptural readings about God knowing me and consecrating me long before I was born seem good enough for God, but not good enough for the Anglican Communion. The fact that in this country, even in the parish where I worship, the presence of gays has been the excuse for breaking relationship with the Episcopal Church and attempting to take the property has hurt deeply. And these court battles over buildings and land continue to this day.
So the actions in Anaheim, which are far greater than I had expected, have really felt like God has noted the misery of the LGBT faithful… and has, in fact, now delivered us. Don’t know if there’s any milk or honey just yet, but at least I know it’s available on the menu.
And even in my glee, I am reminded that while I am happy, others are not feeling the freedom that I am feeling, and would probably resent the characterization of being like the Egyptians. Where I live, here in the southeastern United States, the vast majority of our dioceses were the ones who voted "No" in the House of Bishops (I don’t have numbers on the House of Deputies). No doubt, the ones who lost on the D025 vote are feeling the same way I felt when a woman became Presiding Bishop… and then aided in passing B033, which put the moratoria on same-sex blessings and allowing LGBT people to be bishops. Or, to use a secular analogy, Obama becomes the first African-American president… and my state votes to write a ban on same-sex marriage into the state constitution.
Many advocated for taking things slower, being more cautious. One deputy from Central Florida, sensing the mood that seems to be pervasive in Anaheim, scoffed: "What Integrity (the LGBT Episcopal Group) wants, Integrity gets!" And I know he wasn’t talking about the desire to spread the Good News. In other words, that kicked in the teeth feeling, and even righteous anger, is something that the LGBT faithful have felt and we understand it. All the more reason for us NOT to walk away from each other. If there’s anybody who is going to know the pain of feeling "unheard", it will be your gay and lesbian brothers and sisters.

Still, I wish it were that people wouldn’t see the gains made by the LGBT community as losses to them. The assumption seems to be that if I get a pork chop, then I must have been given the whole pig. Believe me when I say, "It’s just a pork chop, and there’s plenty of loin and bacon for you, too!" To put it in terms of Scripture, one need only look at the feeding of the five thousand to see that all who come and sit down on the grass will be given exactly what they need, exactly the portion they need… and there still will be left-overs. Do not be afraid.

So, I do understand that not everybody is going to be happy with this result. But I also believe that if we are going to be people of God then we must trust that God has a reason for these results… and that anything that is of God is good. If this means adjusting our relationship, then let’s see how we’ll make it work. I speak only for me as one lone lesbian in the Church when I say that I have been called back into the fold after being in exile, and I have been patient with my straight brothers and sisters in Christ. Remember that I live in your world, and must obey your laws which do not treat me equally. To know that the Church is beginning to resemble St. Paul’s words that in Christ there is no Jew or Greek, slave or free, male or female… and now straight or gay… is really the good news that I would hope we both can enjoy!

This entry began with the burning bush story. A powerful image, a moment where God speaks directly to humankind in the person Moses. And even as that fire is burning, the bush is not consumed, and God promises to be with Moses who has no idea how he’s going to stand up to Pharaoh and lead the Israelites. And so rather than us worrying too much about what’s next with our relationships with the rest of the Anglican Communion, why don’t we remove our sandals and stay still at this moment to hear what God is saying. Perhaps it’s that beating heart our Presiding Bishop described: "Mission. Mission. Mission."

The "Season" is Over

Tonight, the LGBT faithful of the Episcopal Church are experiencing the end of Good Friday... finally!
Tonight, we are entering Easter.
Our House of Deputies, again, overwhelming approved D025, effectively ending the season that began with B033 and denied LGBT people the opportunity to be considered for the episcopate.
Rev. Susan Russell of Integrity hails this vote as a step toward truth and inclusion.

"Today's action put the 'Amen' at the end of one of the prayers we have prayed for an inclusive church--ending the BO33 'season' by stating unequivocally that the LGBT baptized can and will have equal access to ordination processes in the Episcopal Church," says Russell. She went on to encourage the House of Bishops to also move the Church forward on blessings for same-sex marriages.

Alleluia, allelulia, alleluia!
The strife is o'er
the battle done
The victory of life is won
The song of triumphant has begun
Alleluia!

D025 amended, and approved!

I have tears in my eyes as I type this. Our House of Bishops, by a vote of 99 yes 45 no and 2 absentions, has approved Resolution D025, which means that the majority of our bishops have recognized that it makes no sense to continue denying faithful LGBT people from fulfilling their call to the episcopate. I honestly wasn't sure it would happen, especially with the Archbishop of Canterbury cautioning that he hoped the bishops wouldn't do this, and the constant cry to take more time to study the issue.

THREE-LEGGED STOOL has the scoop, along with the list of "No" votes, which include several of the bishops from this corner of the United States, including the Diocese of Florida. THE EPISCOPAL CAFE has an Imperfect Roll Call tally here.

Again, nothing is set in stone yet. The Bishops did make an amendment which many of the bloggers at the Convention say is minor. But it means that the resolution goes back to the House of Deputies for approval. The HOD had given a 2-1 margin of approval to this resolution.

I think I'll stop writing, and simply say, "Thanks be to God!" This is amazing!!

Forward progress, but It Ain't Over

Oh, my goodness... how I LOVE getting news from Integrity when it reports such wonderful outcomes at the General Convention. It seems that the LGBT community can feel pretty confident that there are LOTS of people who recognize the time has come to stop keeping us as strangers at the gate when God has already said, "It's all good!"

Two resolutions... D025 and C056... were approved and sent to the House of Bishops. The House of Deputies (these are clergy and laity) were overwhelming in their approval of D025, which among other things will allow for the usual procedures involving discernment, ordination or consecration, of LGBT people. Since 2006, the Church has lived with a rule that specifically barred us from the episcopate. This rule (B033) was adopted to keep everybody in the Anglican Communion happy as they were still reeling from the idea that LGBT people existed (odd, but true, folks!) We in the United States had to be anti-Christs, or of the Devil, to think that LGBT people were actually sitting in the pews. (I wish I was making this up, but I'm not. Just look into the vitriol that has been put out there about us.)

C056... which came out of what's called the Prayer Book, Liturgy and Church Music Committee, takes a step closer to recognizing same-sex blessings in the Church. It seems it must have the temporary blessing of the Bishops Theological Committee... the one chaired by +Parsely of Alabama, that has the "top secret subcommittee". The intent is to come up with a formal proposal not for this convention, but the one in 2012.

Yippee, right?! Yes, of course, we should cheer. But, from across the pond, the fuzzy-faced Archbishop of Canterbury fired a shot across the bow. In an interview with Chris Sugden of Anglican Mainstream, the ABC is quoted as saying:

‘As for General Convention it remains to be seen I think whether the vote of the House of Deputies will be endorsed by the House of Bishops. If the House of Bishops chooses to block then the moratorium remains. I regret the fact that there is not the will to observe the moratorium in such a significant part of the Church in North America but I can’t say more about that as I have no details.’

He regrets this?? And, again, maybe it's living in the schismatic Southern United States, but I read what he's saying as an attempt to circumvent our process and tell our HOB to say, "Hell, No" to these resolutions.

I do recognize that these actions cause discomfort in other parts of the Communion, as well as within our own Church. But I believe these actions are meant to be a call to all of the Communion to recognize that LGBT people are people!

Tonight, in Anaheim, Integrity is screening the film "Voices of Witness: Africa". I have not seen this movie yet, but it documents the level of cruelty inflicted on our African brothers and sisters-in Christ on their own continent. Worse, this persecution is supported by the likes of ++Akinola and ++Orombi. That should make any Christian concerned.

The HOB is debating the merits of some of the proposals from the HOD right now. We'll see what happens.

May God's Holy Spirit move in and amongst and through all of those assembled in Anaheim.

Deputies Make the First Move

So, Integrity is reporting that the House of Deputies has moved forward with a resolution of their own making... called D025... which has the following elements:

1. Reaffirm our commitment to the Anglican Communion
2. State our desire to remain in the highest degree of communion with other Anglican provinces
3. Pledge to participate in contributing to the Communion budget
4. Remind the church of the relationship values established in 2000-D039 (I admit, I don't know what this is).
5. Recognize the response of LGBT Episcopalians to God’s call to service
6. Affirm that God has called and may call partnered gay and lesbian people to any ordained ministry and that their call will be tested by the discernment process provided for in our canons
7. Acknowledge that we are not all of one mind about this

THREE-LEGGED STOOL had posted on this resolution Saturday, showing the language that was struck. It is a very straight-forward document now that much of the extraneous explanations and attempts at 'clarity' were eliminated. The vote was not close at all: the Laity accepted this resolution with a vote of 77 Yes 31 No... the clergy the same thing: 74 Yes 34 No. There were attempts to eliminate the LGBT element... or separate D025 into two different resolutions... an A and B, if you will. Point A would contain points 1-3 and Point B would have all the rest. All of those, which would have weakened the intent of what the Deputies were doing here, went down in defeat.

So, what were the Deputies doing here? From my perspective, they are attempting to find a way back from the dead end road B033 had put the Episcopal Church on in 2006. And they are trying to do it remaining mindful that not all the other members of the Anglican Communion are going to be happy with our acceptance of the LGBT community. But God's Holy Spirit has been calling more and more of us back into the Church... and we are being encouraged to bring our full selves into service. And part of that self is our identity as lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender. To ask us to check that part of ourselves at the door is simply un-Christian. While the apostle Paul is correct to say that in Christ there is no Jew or Greek, slave or free, male or female and...logical extension... black or white... Anglo or Latin... straight or gay... the body of Christ does know that the feet are feet and the hands are hands. But the feet and hands are still part of that body, playing distinct and important roles. And each can be seen as equally valuable in the service of God, and being the stewards of creation.

And so, D025 moves along. But it must find approval from the Bishops, the purple-shirt gang who were the crafters of the troublesome B033. Will they allow for this resolution from the other house to, in effect, annul their rule adopted three years ago?

Stay tuned!

Convention Quotes

I don't really have time to write out a full-length blog on the news coming out of the General Convention... or really my thoughts and musings on that news. But there are a couple of quotes that I really wanted to share:


“If we can develop rites and blessings for fishing fleets and fisherfolk, and for hunts, hounds, horses and houses, including the room where the indoor plumbing is located, we should be able to allow clergy in the exercise of their pastoral ministry to adapt and to appropriate the pastoral office of the blessing of a civil marriage for use with all couples who seek the church’s support and God’s blessing in their marriages. Friends, yes we can do that,” she said. (referring to Bishop Barbara Harris)--Tracy J. Sukraw, Diocese of Massachusetts

Retired Bishop Barbara Harris and NH Bishop Gene Robinson were the main officiants at the Integrity Eucharist, which drew 1600 people! And Bishop Harris really laid it on. Integrity reports:

If the Church honestly believes that LGBT people should not be bishops, she said, then don’t ordain them deacons. ‘Better still be honest… don’t bestow on them the blessing of baptism…. How can you initiate someone and then treat them like some half-assed baptized?’

I LOVE it! How true... as was the rest of Harris' message which took everybody to task to stop trying to decide who's right and who's wrong. The sacred, she says, is that which focuses on God. The profane is that which does not. And I say, Thank you!!!!

So, I am trying to keep my chin up and hope that all in Anaheim will hear the words of our Collect of the Day:

O Lord, mercifully receive the prayers of your people who call upon you, and grant that they may know and understand what things they ought to do, and also may have grace and power faithfully to accomplish them; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.

Wow! And the Plot Thickens...

The General Convention started first thing on Wednesday and seems to have been moving at warp speed on the issues of interest to the LGBT community. Today, it was an intense two-hour-plus meeting of the House of Deputies, the body which is clergy and laity, who met as a whole to get the "feedback from the field" about B033.

And did they ever! Young people told heart-wrenching stories of friends who choose death, literally, over life because being gay and only finding acceptance for one week in the year at a church camp was crushing them inside. And when young people aren't finding their church home welcoming, not only does the Church lose that particular queer individual... rest assured, you will lose their straight friends, too! Nobody wants to hang out in a place where they don't feel they and their friends are welcome. Something to remember when you hear leadership in the church, wringing their hands and fretting over how to make the Church attractive to the younger generation!

I know this to be true, albeit an ancedotal truth, through my own journey. I have had people approach me to say that my service as a lay eucharistic minister has made them feel, "Oh, this (St. John's) is a welcoming congregation." One can have candles, incense, and inclusion! And, thus far, I haven't felt that the clergy is ashamed to have me serve or request that I grow my hair and wear pearls. So all's good.

There's a really great assessment of the testimony in the House of Deputies meeting on THE LEAD which was "live blogging" the event earlier today. Clearly, the Deputies understand the pain caused by B033. What's not clear is where our House of Bishops stand on the question. And since this rule has a "B"... it was THEIR idea, THEIR way of insuring that they could get a trip to England last year, and hang out in Jamaica this Spring. By adopting B033... and offering up the LGBT community as a sacrifice on the Altar of Unity... they thought it was going to re-stitch the tear in the fabric of the Anglican Communion.

Well, it did not do that. Those opposed to TEC were still opposed and remain opposed and will stay opposed to us. And the only thing it really did accomplish was to hurt me and my community, again, and give some Bishops cover for their prejudices.

Tomorrow, the Bishops will continue to seek shelter from scrutiny by holding a closed-door session on B033. The House of Deputies held an open hearing, and gave room to hear from all ends of the spectrum on B033. Most of the Bishops were absent from that hearing, leading one to think that they believe they know best. Afterall, they wear purple.

So does Tinky Winky.

As I have said before, if we are to be a people of God, then we must become quiet and allow God to lead. And the more I listen, the more I read what is being said, the more I pay attention to God's presence in my own life... it seems that God's intent is to show us the way, in that same fashion he gave Peter the vision that said, "nothing I've made is unclean". It is time for this Abrahamic Church to put the knife down and untie the LGBT community from the altar of sacrifice.

Oh, that today you would hearken to His voice!

This Ain't Rocket Science

While Peter was still speaking, the Holy Spirit fell upon all who heard the word. The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astounded that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on the Gentiles, for they heard them speaking in tongues and extolling God. Then Peter said, ‘Can anyone withhold the water for baptizing these people who have received the Holy Spirit just as we have?’ So he ordered them to be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ. Then they invited him to stay for several days. --Acts 10: 44-48

I have found that many of the people who are so vehemently opposed to the LGBT community being actively engaged and part of the Church like to say their arguments are "biblical". Well, the above passage which is part of today's Daily Office readings for Morning Prayer seems to indicate that I'm just as "biblical" in asserting that LGBT people have a place at God's table.
What Peter experienced is what Phillip experienced with the eunuch is what Paul understood when the scales fell from his eyes: God has a purpose... and they are not to get in the way of that purpose to redeem more and more people, but are to go forth and baptize and bring more people in. And out of those newly-reclaimed people, God will call forth more to do that same work of showing the way to the party of eternal life.
Something to think about, folks, as the Church begins Day Three of the General Convention in Anaheim.
I was reading a transcript of some of the testimony on B033 as it was being discussed yesterday in California. And, again, it was a delegate from the "Overcast State"... this time from the Diocese of Central Florida... who defended the need to keep a moratorium on blessing of same-sex marriages and consecrating more gay bishops. The man, sensing he was in the minority, flippantly said, "What Integrity wants, Integrity will get."
Naturally, Integrity President Rev. Susan Russell noted that what Integrity "wants" is for us to live into the promise of the gospel and the good news. Hopefully, then, we WILL get what Integrity wants.
As my friend and brother-in-Christ +Gene Robinson says, "My 'gay agenda' is Jesus!"

Almighty Father, whose blessed Son before his passion prayed for his disciples that they might be one, as you and he are one: Grant that your Church, being bound together in love and obedience to you, may be united in one body by one Spirit, that the world may believe in him whom you have sent, your Son Jesus Christ our Lord; who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen. --BCP, pg. 255