The Secret of Dan Brown

There's been much buzz on the internet and in magazine's about author Dan Brown's newest novel, "The Lost Symbol". More intrigue, more secret societies, more codes, more Masons, more Knights Templar, more albino monks. I will admit that I have never bought nor read any of his books. I'm not much of a fiction reader. I did see the movie of "The DaVinci Code", and was underwhelmed.

But the real reason I have difficulty bringing myself to read a Dan Brown book is because I know the roots of his theology. I have personal knowledge of the influence that helped shaped young Danny Brown's mind in his youthful days at Christ Church in Exeter, NH. I am far too familiar with the stories he was told in his Sunday School class.

Because, you see: Young Danny learned about the divine mysteries from my mother!

Yes, if you want to know how Dan Brown might have come to believe that Jesus and Mary Magdelene had a fling... and a child... it was probably the logical conclusion young Danny reached when he heard his Sunday School teacher proclaim that, "Jesus was the first politician!" I mean, it certainly would be in keeping with politicians of the modern era... not to mention his own time... if Jesus were to father a child outside of marriage!

It's too weird, this six-degrees of separation which is really more like a degree-and-a-half that I have with Dan Brown. The man who has made millions writing books about Opus Dei and causing the Roman Catholic Church to aid in his publicity by putting his efforts on the "Do Not Read EVER" list... is the blonde-haired boy who sang the role of Amahl in Amahl and the Night Visitors. (I was one of the peasant extras in our church's production.) His parents and sister were also active in the church, so I know the family fairly well.

Which made it all the more surreal when I kept having friends tell me, "Oh, My God! You have to read The DaVinci Code by Dan Brown! It is soooo good!" It should be noted that most of the friends who have really loved his novel are ex-Roman Catholics. When I finally realized, looking at the book one day in Borders, that Dan Brown was Danny, I laughed out loud at the recognition. It's actually kind of fun knowing that I knew the celebrity before he was famous.

Better yet: I know his Sunday School teacher!

Questioning and Questing

So, the other day I revealed a truth about my third-grade self: I ended my Sunday School career by drawing a picture of a black Labrador and saying, "Dog spelled backwards is God!" That's why I found it a bit funny, and very spooky and daunting, that I had been approached by my current parish to be a Sunday School teacher.


I declined, politely. I think I could do it. Trouble is, I have so many other commitments (church and otherwise) that to take on dealing with kids I just thought, "No, this would be one thing too many right now."


I've been told by others that the very fact that I was a child full of questions ("Why can't I be a shepherd instead of an angel?" "Why must I be confirmed before being an acolyte?"), makes me a great adult to work with kids. The fact that I was never satisfied with "because I said so"-type answers may qualify me to work with teen-agers. That I endured some tremendous personal pain and suffering, bouts of serious depression, and struggles with my sexuality while attending a New England prep school, and lived to remember and tell the tale... also apparently is a plus for having the ability to work well with teens.

But if I ever do take on a ministry such as Sunday School, I would hope that the lesson I learned in confirmation class would inform how I work with kids.

In the early 1980s, the confirmation classes from Christ Church had to go on a weekend trip to Sign of the Dove Retreat Center in Temple, New Hampshire. I really, really, really didn't want to do this. I am an introvert, and I never felt "at home" with my peers. So, I was not looking forward to this event. The priest at the center was engaging and friendly. And he was not about to let me slip off into a corner and hide. At this time in my faith journey, I was what I would call a "punk". We had looked at the Nicene Creed in class, and I had found the phrase to use to play, "Stump the priest". And since this center director was new to me and wanted to engage me, this punk was ready to play the game. And so I asked the question:

"In the Nicene Creed, we say "Begotten, not made." So, I want to know... where'd God come from?"

I'd posed this question to my rector who had brushed it off as "not the right question". I had posed it to our curate, who tried mightily to concoct an answer and finally gave up and asked me why I asked impossible questions. Now, I awaited this man's answer. And I was totally surprised. First, he looked me in the eyes. And as he smiled, his eyes seemed to almost dance at the delight that I had asked for this explanation.

"That's a great question!" he exclaimed. "I don't know!"

What? Priests were supposed to know everything. Priests had the handy-dandy answers at their fingertips, or at the very least, the ability to always say, "Because I said so." But this guy, the one with the seminary training and the black shirt and white, round collar, was saying he didn't know?! He went on.

"I don't know. But I have faith that God does exist, even if I don't know where God came from." He went on to talk more about faith, and the meaning of having faith in something that can't be readily seen, scientifically-tested, and proven on paper. Better yet, he kept looking at me, and talking to me as if I had just posed the most important question of the day. And then he turned the question back on me:

"How about your faith? Do you have faith in God?"

A dialogue! He actually wanted to dialogue with me? And he was asking me what felt like a critical piece to this whole confirmation process.

"Um, yeah."

"Great!" And he encouraged me to keep thinking, and to keep asking the questions I was asking.

In one 15-minute conversation, this priest had turned this punk on my head, and gave me a rare moment of actually being met in a theological discussion where I was not only taken seriously, but I was seen as having asked a question worthy of a real talk. So profound was this experience that I remember it, almost thirty years later, as one of the markers in my faith journey.

And it has given me a model for how I think all adults should deal with children, especially teen-agers. No matter how flippant the question may be posed... it is still a question. If you meet the question with thoughtfulness and seriousness... and a smile... you could make some serious inroads into a teen's understanding of their faith.

Oh, yes, the priest at the retreat center was the Reverend Gene Robinson, the current bishop of New Hampshire.


'Nuff said.

Holy Cross Day

Almighty God, whose Son our Savior Jesus Christ was lifted high upon the cross that he might draw the whole world to himself; Mercifully grant that we, who glory in the mystery of our redemption, may have grace to take up our cross and follow him; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, in glory everlasting. Amen.

Collect for Holy Cross Day (Contemporary), BCP, pg.244

It's interesting to me that Holy Cross Day comes the day after we have a gospel reading from Mark where the disciples are quizzed by Jesus on "Who do people say that I am?" This leads up to that moment when Peter... who had earlier received a gold star for saying, "You're the Messiah" then does his Peter-thing of no longer seeing Jesus, God incarnate, but Jesus, that awesome guy who's going to make things better for us Jews in this Roman Empire. The news that Jesus will have to die is "not acceptable" to Peter, and he rebukes Jesus... bringing us to the famous words, "Get behind me, Satan!" (Satan, in my understanding, is "tempter"... not "horned red demon") Jesus then goes on to say,

"If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake, and for the sake of the gospel, will save it." --Mark 8:34-35

This is hefty stuff. Think about what that means? Again, one could see it as a literal "dying" for the sake of the gospel, the sake of Christ (and the disciples will eventually get this). But, I think for us today especially in places where Christianity is practiced freely, this is a call to give up our own self-interests that keep us separate from God. As we say in the General Thanksgiving:

...give us such an awareness of your mercies,

that with truly thankful hearts we may show forth your praise,

not only with our lips, but in our lives,

by giving up our selves to your service,

and by walking before you

in holiness and righteousness all our days.

I am left pondering, "What does it take for me to take up my cross and follow God?"

This is what I'm reflecting on for this Holy Cross Day. I'll be bringing this same kind of reflection to my EfM class this evening.

God and Dog

I got this video by email recently, and thought I'd share it with all my fellow animal lovers. I chuckled at the title since my career in Sunday School ended with the day that I was asked, yet again, to draw a picture of what I thought God looked like... and I drew a dog. A Black Labrador to be precise.
"Now, Susie, you don't think this is what God looks like?" the teacher asked.
"Yes, I do. Dog spelled backwards is God."
For this smart-ass response, I was asked to leave the class. I suppose it was a sign of devil worship that I, a third grader, had figured out the reverse spelling of "God"! So Ms. Francisco's song is a sweet, simple affirmation that I must have been on to something much deeper!
Naaahhh.... I just was fed up with Sunday School.
Enjoy this video. I'm off to do my EfM homework.

In Memorium: September 11th

I was still a public radio journalist the morning of September 11, 2001. I had a doctor's appointment that morning, and so was going to be late coming into work. But while sitting in the office, and listening to the nurses huddled around a television, I heard one of them say, "The towers are collapsing!" And that's when I went to the desk, canceled my appointment, and called my supervisor to find out where I should go. Instructions: head to the state's Emergency Management Office.

There, me and all the media corps based in Florida's capital city watched over and over and over the images of planes flying into the WTC, fires, ashes, panic, grief. And we were all still. We did our jobs of finding out if there was any threat to our state and its many landmarks; to our Governor, brother of the then-President; to our then-President who had been in our state that day. But mostly, we all felt the connection to our people, our families, our friends... and to all those who were killed in an act of aggression. For a day, the members of the media were not simply observers. We all felt this attack deeply.

Each of us has responded in our own way to what happened that day. In the days and weeks afterward, there were forums in cities including Tallahassee, organized by religious leaders to bring about dialogue amongst the Abrahamic faith traditions. This was an opportunity for those who knew next to nothing about Islam to hear from those who do NOT advocate for killing all Americans. But against this backdrop of discussion, there was the rising tide of unbridled nationalism and patriotism and accusations that if you did not support going to war against Iraq, you were a soft-bellied anti-American. Our media, as I said, had also felt this attack, and voices of dissent were not allowed the same amount of face-time, air-time, print-time as those who were beating the drum of war. Yes, even on National Public Radio, the supposedly left-leaning network on the "left" end of the dial... seemed to want to "over-correct" for any perceived bias.

On this day, I remember the moment where everything seemed to come to a halt. And I ask God to remember us.

Let all who seek you rejoice in you and be glad;

let those who love your salvation continually say,

"Great is the Lord!"

Though I am poor and afflicted,

the Lord will have regard for me.

You are my helper and my deliverer;

do not tarry, O my God.

Ps. 40: 17-19

"You lie"

In all likelihood, you have seen or heard about the outburst from Rep. Joe Wilson, R-South Carolina, during President Obama's speech on Healthcare Reform last night. For readers outside the United States, know that our joint sessions of Congress with a Presidential address usually feature enthusiastic, or tepid, applause, occasional laughter, and overall, civil behavior.

Rep. Wilson's shout of "You lie!" from the chamber, therefore, was shocking. Had this been a session of the House of Representatives, and a constituent from the gallery shouted something at lawmakers on the floor, that person would have been hustled out of the room pronto... and fined for the disruption.
The President's speech laid out his plan for reform, a plan that aims to get a handle on the rising costs of health care in this country and give some means for people like myself to finally be able to afford insurance again. The President is not advocating for the demise of private insurance companies. I'm sorry to hear that because I would like to see the CEO of Blue Cross/Blue Shield of Florida out of his job and facing the peril of how to pay basic living expenses. But that's just me.
The President is proposing to keep some kind of a public option in the reform plan as a means of letting those with the least have some kind of access to the system... if private insurance companies refuse to lower their ridiculously high premiums.
Much of the rest of what he said sounds familiar to those of us who remember the late-Governor Lawton Chiles in Florida, and his desire to see small businesses coming together in "purchasing pools" in what he called Community Health Partnerships (or CHiPAs) to shop for the best, affordable, health insurance. It's a good idea... if we can make it work.
President Obama quoted from a letter written by the late Massachusetts Sen. Ted Kennedy in which the Senator talked about the character of our country. I would like to believe that the character of our country is such that we would strive to make health care something ALL of us can afford to have.
But then, there is Rep. Joe Wilson. And there are those folks in Wakulla County, FL. And there are the "tea parties".
Lord, have mercy upon us.
Christ, have mercy upon us.
Lord, have mercy upon us.

Being Comfortable in One's Skin

I do love and admire my cat.

Mostly, I think I love and admire how at ease she is with who she is in the world. And if you have a problem with that, well... that really is YOUR problem, isn't it?

Cats, dogs, just about any animal, when loved and cared for can show us a very basic way of being in the world: simple, and comfortable in being just as they are.

I find that's one of the stumbling blocks for us humans. We just can't seem to get comfortable in our skin. We think of ourselves as too fat, too thin, too tall, too short, too young, too old, too stiff.

What brings all this to mind is a recent training on sexual harassment and sexual exploitation. I had to do the "Safeguarding God's People" course as part of being a Eucharistic Minister in the diocese. Coming from a profession where my job is to touch people who are lying nude or semi-nude under a sheet in a massage office, I have been trained pretty thoroughly in what is appropriate touch and talk with my clients, so there wasn't a whole lot of new information for me. Surprisingly, though, this seems to be "new" for lots of other people. And I could not help but wonder why.

As I thought about it, I considered what it is about humans that when we get to something that is "a matter of the flesh" we get all weird about it. The flesh we wear is God-given, right? The body our soul animates reflects the emotions and habits of our souls and thus becomes infused with our outward and visible being, right? And God, in an act of amazing grace and mercy, actually took on a body like ours in yet another try at being in relationship with his final work of creation, yes?

All of this tells me that the body is NOT bad, and the flesh is not bad. Sex is not bad, either. Well, usually.

Where the "bad" comes in, I think, is when our actions with our bodies become motivated for our own gratification at the expense of another one made in God's image. It goes back to the very early lesson, "Love God and love your neighbor as yourself" aka "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you". For most adults, this should provide the appropriate guidance.

Still, there seems to be a dis-ease when it comes to the body. In the church, I think words from St. Paul, particularly in Romans, have been used to "beat down" the body. We are told that "sin" is in the flesh and we are to set our "minds" on the spirit. At times, there seems to be this internal battle raging within the apostle Paul about his own body, and trying to rise above this human casing to reach a more Christ-like state. Hence, the teaching becomes body=sin; mind=holy. And this is when we divide body from mind... and... well, I have seen countless examples in my massage practice of what happens when we deny the health and well-being of the body in favor of the mind that we think is a separate entity!

As artful in language as I think Paul can be, I have to wonder if there isn't something that got lost in our 21st century interpretation of what this man from the First Century was saying. The way I read it, it's not that having a body, and appreciating the body is a "sin". But if your mind, your soul, sets its sights on God... and not on money, power, pride, etc.... you will be putting on the "armor of light" that Paul talks about.

Just my theology as of September 10, 2009.

Here's hoping that you can feel comfortable enough in your own body that you can more easily see all that God has created... including other people... just as they are.