Marking Sad Moments

It was on this date a year ago that a young Massachusetts boy, Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, took his own life rather to take another day of bullying and harassment. Carl's classmates picked on him, calling him a "faggot" and "gay". How sad that those words beat out of Carl the will to stay alive.

To mark this sad date, the Gay, Lesbian, Straight, Education Network (GLSEN) is asking people to contact their U.S. Representatives and urge passage of the Safe Schools Improvement Act. GLSEN has set up a web site which you can get to HERE to get specific information about this anti-bullying bill.

Let's learn something from Carl's death, and put an end to the benign neglect of school administrators to anti-gay slurs and harassment and bullying of kids.

I Am A Social Justice Christian

A great response to Glenn Beck's accusations that "social justice Christian" is code language for "Nazism and Socialism".

As the World Turns...

I have been relatively quiet on all the shenanigans going on in the news with regard to the latest round of scandal involving the Roman Catholic Church. I decided I would rather spend my Holy Week on the blog focusing on things eternal, rather than temporal.

But all bets are off now, especially after the Archbishop of Canterbury has weighed in on the scandal in Ireland, which is the scandal in Germany, which is the scandal in the United States, which is the scandal in.... (OK, you see what I'm saying). It is far too easy for me to launch into my own criticism of the Roman Catholic Church, good little Episcopalian that I am. I think the New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd put it best when she quipped that the Roman church had given up credibility for Lent.

Honestly, the closing ranks to defend the Pope from those meanies in the media who wouldn't stop asking questions about the hide-n-seek method of dealing with priestly pedophiles reached the height of absurdity on Good Friday when the Pope's priest at the Vatican actually compared the reporting on the scandals to the persecution of Jews. Wow! Jews have been killed and tortured for who they are, for their religious beliefs. Is pedophilia an immutable trait and a religious doctrine of the Roman Catholic Church?

(See, I said it was too easy!)

But let's get back to ++Rowan. He criticized the situation in Ireland on the BBC. He bemoans the "loss of credibility" of the church there, and he is pretty sure now that all those conservatives who've been so hopping mad in England aren't likely to defect from Anglicanism to align themselves with the RCs now. I agree with Archbishop in his analysis that what this scandal in the Roman Church does is taint just about everyone who is Christian just because Roman Catholicism is so pervasive as the "face of Christianity" throughout the world. Still, I scoff at the Archbishop making any noise about anyone else when he must look at himself in the mirror knowing how he has lost credibilty amongst many of us on this side of the pond. He will sputter and stammer on about +Gene Robinson and soon-to-be +Mary Glasspool... but give only very lukewarm commentary on Uganda. He has offered an apology to the LGBT faithful for any appearances of not respecting our human dignity. But continues to offend with suggesting that we are not worthy of the office of bishop. Sadly, the ABC keeps falling short. He is, in my mind, a little like the apostle Peter before Pentecost: opening his mouth, and just when you think he's 'got it', he says something that makes you shake your head and say, "Oh, Peter, Peter, Peter!"

It will be interesting to see what happens when the Pope arrives at Lambeth Palace. Wonder if we'll see a different photo emerge than the one in this entry?

Easter 2010

Jesus said to her, ‘Woman, why are you weeping? For whom are you looking?’ Supposing him to be the gardener, she said to him, ‘Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I will take him away.’ Jesus said to her, ‘Mary!’ She turned and said to him in Hebrew, ‘Rabbouni!’ (which means Teacher). Jesus said to her, ‘Do not hold on to me, because I have not yet ascended to the Father. But go to my brothers and say to them, “I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.” ’ Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples, ‘I have seen the Lord’; and she told them that he had said these things to her.--John 20:15-18

I have said that I think trying to preach a sermon on Easter Sunday must be a huge task. I mean, what is there left to say? What more can a person offer other than a shout of "Hallelujah!! And Thanks Be to God!!"?
God has done the impossible. God has taken death and turned it on its head. The Romans (Pilate) and the high priests (Caiphus) and Jewish leadership (Herod Antipas) had become friends in their common desire to crush down this rebel for the cause of love. For Rome, Jesus would be the warning to all the Israelites; any uppity Jew is going to be killed in a painfully slow and excruciating death.
So, imagine what that must have been for Mary Magdalene and the others to discover that their friend and advocate for another way, the way of love, had been resurrected. Not only has he burst the prison of the grave; he's blown it to smithereens!
Still, the interesting statement I see in the passage from the John gospel is when he tells Mary, "Do not hold on to me, because I have not yet ascended to the Father." This feels to me like Jesus is saying, 'I've still got more to do... and I can't be kept here.' And he tasks Mary Magdalene (yes, a woman) to be the one who tells what is the very Good News that Jesus Christ is risen today! Alleluia!
I've also understood that statement from Jesus as the warning to all of us who have come to believe in him; do not hold me in the human, solid, flesh and blood form, especially in that crucified form. Know that I have been that... and I am that and much more. And the "much more" will come with the ascension into Heaven, where he will be joined again with God and where he can do even more for us by being that link for us to God, a window in which we, those who are Christian, will see God. Besides, he is not the end of God's purpose. He has promised that God's purpose will be worked in the world when the Holy Spirit comes.
On this day, the Lord has acted. The joy and rejoicing of Easter comes in knowing that Love is alive and reaching out to continue touching and changing lives. Love is calling back all those who were driven into the wilderness. Love is reviving the dead and giving them new life.
Is it any wonder that the song that was on my lips this morning wasn't a hymn, but the Beatles?

"All you need is love. All you need is love. All you need is love, Love. Love is all you need."

This Is The Night....

Tonight, the "Alleluias" returned. The celebration of Christ's victory over the brutish nastiness that led to his crucifixion marks the beginning of the light that should be kindled in the hearts of all Christians. The bullies don't get the last word. The powerful don't get to gloat that they put down the rebellious and relentless messenger of love. The question, "Where is your God?" can be answered: Here with us.... again! So, take that!
I participated as a Eucharistic Minister and lector during the Great Easter Vigil at St. John's, which is one of my favorite services in the whole year. I was thrilled to be assigned again the reading from Exodus about the moment when Moses stretches out his hand, and God parts the Sea of Reeds and allows the Israelites to escape. There was one line in the text that really grabbed, particularly as one who is among the lesbian faithful in the Church. The Israelites were complaining (again!) and protesting to Moses that they would have been better off remaining slaves in Egypt rather than escaping to the wilderness:

But Moses said to the people, ‘Do not be afraid, stand firm, and see the deliverance that the Lord will accomplish for you today; for the Egyptians whom you see today you shall never see again. The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to keep still.--Exodus 14:13-14

"The Egyptians whom you see today you shall never see again." Those of us from the "other" status have faced so many Egyptians in our lives. I felt it again a few weeks ago sitting in the Leon County Commission meeting about the Human Rights Ordinance. All we want is protection from being fired or denied housing based upon our orientation... and there were three Pharoahs who, listening to the Egyptians, believed that the way to settle the issue was to put the lives of LGBT people up for a public vote.
So, when I hear Moses... a servant of God... saying "Stand firm. Don't be afraid. You won't be seeing these Egyptians again!", I hear a pledge of protection and an enormous amount of help to see that what is old will fade away... because a new thing is coming. I hear in that statement what all my elders in the LGBT community keep saying: the change we want to see is coming. Be still because God (and many others) are fighting for you.
That fight for Israel's freedom continued with Jesus Christ, the son of God. And his knock-out punch was to burst his three-days prison of the grave. This was done for the whole world, absolutely, positively every living, breathing piece of creation... be it flora or fauna or human being. For gay people, there is an enormous release when you contemplate the contempt Jesus experienced in the name of love... only to come out on top at the end. We know his struggle all too well in our own lives!

This is the night, when you brought our fathers, the children
of Israel, out of bondage in Egypt, and led them through the
Red Sea on dry land.

This is the night, when all who believe in Christ are delivered
from the gloom of sin, and are restored to grace and holiness
of life.

This is the night, when Christ broke the bonds of death and hell,
and rose victorious from the grave.--BCP, pg. 287

Therefore, let us be glad and rejoice in it!!

Holy Saturday Tiredness

O God, Creator of heaven and earth: Grant that, as the
crucified body of your dear Son was laid in the tomb and
rested on this holy Sabbath, so we may await with him the
coming of the third day, and rise with him to newness of life;
who now lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one
God, for ever and ever. Amen.

This morning as I went through the ritual of Morning Prayer I could feel how tired I am. So this idea of resting, so that I might rise in the newness of life sounds like a plan to me!

My tiredness isn't just a physical one brought on by the abundance of pollen in the Tallahassee air. I am tired mentally. I am tired emotionally. I have had a lot on my mind and my heart during this Holy Week, some of which I have expressed here. Some of it has to do with the Church (universal and local). Some of it is has to do with my many secular activities. No matter the cause of my tiredness, I feel it and I know that at various times during the week, I have wanted to hide in a cave.

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who in every respect has been tested as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. --Hebrews 4: 15-16

In discussing some of what has been ailing my mind and spirit during confession yesterday, I was told to remember that important part of the passion play in the garden of Gesthemane. Jesus, knowing what is coming his way and the pain he must endure, demonstrates his full humanity by begging "let this cup pass from me." He "gets it". He knows that there are those times when life and 'the world' can feel too heavy to stand up, and that the responsibilities we're asked to shoulder may seem like they're too much. And yet he still says, "Not my will, but thy will be done."

I do not know, nor do I presume to know, what God's purpose is for me and my tiredness. I feel that God's presence and persistence in my life is for a reason. I feel as though all things that I am doing, and facing, are all a part of a greater plan which will be unfolded at the time when it needs to be unfolded. There is a legal term for that: "ripe", much like the fruit on the vine.

For now, I need to rest.

Good (Grief!) Friday

Simon Peter said to him, ‘Lord, where are you going?’ Jesus answered, ‘Where I am going, you cannot follow me now; but you will follow afterwards.’ Peter said to him, ‘Lord, why can I not follow you now? I will lay down my life for you.’ Jesus answered, ‘Will you lay down your life for me? Very truly, I tell you, before the cock crows, you will have denied me three times.--John 13: 36-38

Hearing this story now, 2000 years later, we all know what Jesus meant and we all know that eager Peter meant well, but could not take that extra step of denying his own life to be with his friend for a miserable, bloody ending. We call this day "Good Friday". It hardly feels "good" when we contemplate the events of the day that took place way back when in Jerusalem. It can hardly feel "good" for anyone who has been feeling the weight of the world this week. Truly, it feels as if we ought to call this "Grief Friday". Or "Good Grief! Friday".

The "Good" part, though, is not the act of brutally killing Christ on the cross. The "Good" is in the meaning of that act. Jesus didn't subject himself to this death for his own sake. Like that of the footwashing, this is the biggest example of "not for self, but for others" servitude. Jesus, following the will of God (a will he is intimately familiar with) is making this sacrifice of his human body as a means of, once and for all, taking away the sins of the world. He takes them away by taking them into his skin, into his heart, into his mind, into his entire being and allowing them to die with him. And from out of that death comes the salvation which he promised to all of us... even those who hadn't come within his reach during his ministry.

But back to Peter. He wants to know "Where are you going?" and Jesus tells him "You cannot follow me now, but you will afterwards." Peter insists that he'll lay down his life. But Jesus already knows THAT isn't true. What is true is that Peter will deny him three times.

This moment gives me pause. Day after day... and week after week... we pledge to give up our selves to follow God in righteousness and holiness. But to really do that means to be willing to go this way, the way of living for God, and not for our selves. Do we really do that? How many times do we say we will, but then we deny God? And I'm not talking about in the way Peter did it. That's different. I'm talking about the way we put objects of our desire first in our lives. The way we allow fear to govern our actions towards others.

As lesbian, as one who has taken on roles of leadership in my community that I wasn't really prepared to get into, I know I have felt that loneliness of living in "the crucified place". But I'm also painfully aware of my Peter tendancies. Probably more so on a day like today than most others. And so I look to God and say, "I'm sorry."