Sunday, April 27, 2008
Bullies and Silence
But I do keep up with some news via the internet. And thus I was aware that across the country, many people were taking a vow of silence on Friday to remember a California eighth-grader by the name of Lawrence King. Larry, as he was called, had already self-identified as gay. In February, he asked another boy to be his Valentine. The other boy, a kid named Brandon, didn’t take this invitation well at all. Instead of simply telling Larry “No, thanks,” he made it permanent by shooting him in the head and killing him.
Consider this senseless act of violence, and then juxtapose that information against the debate in the Florida House over the anti-bullying bill, named “The Jeffrey Johnston Stand Up for All Students Act.” Johnston was a 15 year-old Cape Coral boy who killed himself after enduring nearly two years of harassment both in school and in cyberspace. His mother, a teacher, has been trying to get the bill passed for three years…and several LGBT-friendly organizations have been working this “school safety” legislation for much longer than that. The bill would instruct school districts to develop strategies for dealing with bullies and their parents. It spells out different types of bullying…including stalking and destruction of property. It also says it applies to bullying based on “sexual, racial or religious grounds”.
Just those three? An attempt to amend the bill to include “gender-based” bullying reportedly caused a 45-minute debate. The Democrats wanted the change, arguing that it was important to instruct people specifically on bullying because of “gender preference”. But the Republicans successfully argued against that inclusion because the bill was “about the bully, not the victims of bullying.”
The bill passed overwhelmingly. It’s now in the Florida Senate message calendar. And everyone in the Capitol can take comfort in knowing that it doesn’t “offend”.
But it does offend me. Because Lawrence King is not the first kid to get killed…or kill him/herself for being gay. And there is still so much tolerance for gay jokes and gay stereotypes and referring to things UNcool as "that's so gay". People will praise a movie like “Brokeback Mountain” for being groundbreaking and daring to depict two western men in love, and not stop to think, “Hey: it’s another mainstream film about a gay relationship that leaves lives in shambles, with one guy dead and another a drunken bum alone in a trailer.” The tears I shed for that film were not about the storyline, but about the constant presentation to an American audience that “those people are just dysfunctional”.
And the churches are not helping much. To be sure, there are those who are making efforts to include all of God’s children and make everyone sitting in the pews on Sunday feel welcomed to be there and share in hearing the Word of God. But then I read something like Rev. Matt Kennedy’s sermon, and I realize, in my universe of the Episcopal Church, we have miles to go before we can sit back and rest on our more evolved laurels with the requisite cocktail in hand.
“Search for the Lord and his strength;
continually seek his face”
--Psalm 105: 4
Those of us who are seeking God know that it will take patience, courage and strength to change minds and attitudes. May the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, continue to move in this world and guide us toward more compassion for each other…for the Larrys and the Brandons…the legislators and the Matt Kennedys. Amen.
Saturday, April 26, 2008
And furthermore....
PRELUDIUM: We rise to play a greater part
And just a PS: if you have time, take a moment to click on the link within Fr. Mark's posting to read the sermon by Rev. Matt Kennedy in the diocese of Central New York. Just in case you don't believe that the thieves of Christ's message aren't alive and well within the Episcopal Church! Bigotry knows no geographic boundaries.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
In Memorium
So, for my Jewish partner, I am including the English translation of the Kaddish, the Hebrew prayer of mourning for her father, Arthur:
Glorified and sanctified be God's great name throughout the world which He has created according to His will. May He establish His kingdom in your lifetime and during your days, and within the life of the entire House of Israel, speedily and soon; and say, Amen.
May His great name be blessed forever and to all eternity.
Blessed and praised, glorified and exalted, extolled and honored, adored and lauded be the name of the Holy One, blessed be He, beyond all the blessings and hymns, praises and consolations that are ever spoken in the world; and say, Amen.
May there be abundant peace from heaven, and life, for us
and for all Israel; and say, Amen.
He who creates peace in His celestial heights, may He create peace for us and for all Israel; and say, Amen.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Contemplating "The Way"
One of my good friends once did a radio commentary in which she discusses how each one of us has “the way” things are to be done. There is “the way” one folds the laundry or puts dollar bills back into a wallet or pumps gas or any myriad of things that merit a system of doing. And, naturally, whatever is your “way” is “the way”. Incidentally, questioning “the way” should be done at your own risk.
And you shoo tha blues away
When cares pursue ya
Hallelujah!
Gets you through tha darkest day!
--Ella Fitzgerald
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Coming Out as Christian
So, now that you all know the steps I went through to come out as “queer”, time to talk about the other-half of my identity as a Christian.
I have encountered several different reactions to my faith. There are those who take the “to each their own” stance. But there are many who, if I say I’m Christian, either go silent, or look away. Or they tell me why they aren’t as if they expect me to start arguing with them. I keep thinking that issue here has to do with whatever trauma has been inflicted on gay individuals by churches or synagogues. There are just too many stories that I’ve heard from people about family members “praying for them” that they might “cure” them of this homosexual affliction. I have heard from lesbians who attended the Episcopal Church in the earlier part of this decade only to be met with a sermon so homophobic and misogynistic that they left in tears, never to return again. Such stories are painful to hear. And I do understand how rotten it can make one feel. To those who have felt that rejection, all I can say is to remember who is rejecting you: people, not God. Even the one with the collar standing in the pulpit is still just another human being in the same soup with the rest of us. And they are more likely to make mistakes than the shepherd who knows you by your name and your true self.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Bishop Gene Robinson at Seabury-Western
Friday, April 18, 2008
Coming Out as Queer
Maybe it’s because it’s spring. Maybe it’s my recent experiences with college students and others in
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Striking a Balance
This past summer, I worked on the production of “The Weimar House”, a mock horror film in which the horror is gay marriage. I had written the piece initially for radio, and then re-worked it with the cast and crew to be a screenplay. Thus far, the video has garnered some awards, has received warm responses from audiences, and is likely to make it into some LGBT Film Festivals.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Comment from Canterbury on anti-gay violence
If you have been following the news in the world of the Anglican Communion, you might have heard about the escalating violence towards LGBT-Anglican leaders in Nigeria. The Archbishop of Canterbury has decided to weigh in:
In response to reports of violence and threats towards Christians involved in the debate on human sexuality, the Archbishop of Canterbury has given the following statement:
“The threats recently made against the leaders of Changing Attitudes are disgraceful. The Anglican Communion has repeatedly, through the Lambeth Conference and the statements from its Primates’ Meetings, unequivocally condemned violence and the threat of violence against gay and lesbian people. I hope that this latest round of unchristian bullying will likewise be universally condemned.”
I am happy the ABC has issued this statement. The threats against these leaders are real, and, frankly, the Church has done little to stop it. In fact, the Anglican Nigerian Primate Peter Akinola is an outspoken homophobe!
And while I'm glad to see the ABC acknowledge that this sort of "bullying" is "unchristian", I wonder if he will take time to meditate on his own actions and how they play into this sort of violence in which bigots are emboldened to beat other human beings simply because they are gay. The ABC could not find it within himself to extend an invitation to the Rt. Rev. Gene Robinson to attend the once-a-decade Bishop-athon (aka the Lambeth Conference). Surely the Archbishop is a learned man, and I'm sure quite capable of mindfulness and soul-searching prayer. Perhaps now would be a good time for him to consider that by specifically excluding the one and only openly-gay bishop in the Anglican Communion, he unwittingly and unknowingly became a tacit conspirator in the violence. I'm not saying that he condoned these attacks. But too often people in authority fail to see how their words and their actions become the justification for "unchristian bullying".
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Drink up!
Back in the late 1980s, I used to think it was fun to go eavesdrop on the Maranatha group on the University of Missouri campus. They usually had some sort of highly-inflammatory presentation at least once a month, and, on occasion, I’d go listen and then become livid when they would do things such as pervert the text from First Corinthians 6: 9-10 to include “homosexuals” among the group of undesirables the apostle Paul said would not inherit the kingdom of God. Although I was not “out” at the time, and was, in fact, still struggling to be straight, I did not believe lesbians and gays were going to be tossed into the fire unless they repented the core of their beings.
Glad I had already reached that conclusion for myself! Not that it made coming to terms with my own sexual orientation any easier. But I imagine that I would have been a bigger mess if I had really believed the lies that the Maranathas and others liked to spread about me and “my people”. From their standpoint, I am a product of Satan. I am someone to be feared. Women should latch on to their husbands and shelter the children from my sight. In some ways, I think that the LGBT community represent for the religious right-wingers the lepers of the 21st century. Or maybe they’re like the olden-day Jews and we’re their version of the Samaritans.
Perhaps that’s why I was so struck with the gospel story about Jesus’ talk with the Samaritan woman at the well. Here’s Jesus, a Jewish man, initiating a conversation with a woman who is one of “those people”. She is taken aback at first that this guy is even bothering to engage her. And as these two stayed in relationship with each other, the woman becomes more amazed at how completely this man knew her, understood her, and wanted to her to experience the kind of water he could provide. So amazed that she goes back and tells the rest of “her people” about him, and they all head up the hill to meet Jesus themselves. And once he gets to talking with them, the Samaritans want him to hang out for a couple of days which he does. And thus a cultural barrier is broken down.
So, if I am to think of myself in the role of that Samaritan woman…a woman who others in the culture see as one of “those people”…what a refreshing and loving feeling to know that God’s intent is not to tell me to “get lost and get a drink elsewhere, you dyke” but rather to take time to be with me. He wants me to stay in the conversation. And He wants to meet me so completely that He is offering a chance to quench my thirst forever. And no amount of me saying, “Yes, but I’m not this, or that, or the other” matters to Him. He doesn’t care about the labels, the categories or the excuses. He just wants me to have the drink.
In the story, it is about water. But I believe you can take it beyond that. What I think this woman desired, and what I think any one of us wants, is to feel acceptance and love. And it is my belief that the God who keeps me engaged in conversation and plants a song in my brain every day is continually telling me that this dialogue we’re in is about His acceptance of me and His deep and abiding love that is there for me always, no strings attached. No hidden clauses or exceptions. And He is not concerned with me being one of “those people” because He knows me much more completely than any label I, or the culture, might have for me. In his accounting, he is looking for those who desire to choose life over death, those who are fully awake and not just sleep-walking. If I trust in that truth, and not the words of right-wingers and nutty Maranathas, I will find that the doors of the Kingdom of Heaven are open to me and all others who will accept his offer to take a drink. Because the cup of salvation is there for anyone who wants it.
The bar is open. What are we waiting for?
Monday, April 7, 2008
Taxes Take Time
Don't abandon me yet. I've had to put my attention to my taxes; hence I haven't had the time to write what I want to write. Instead, I've been working with Excel spreadsheets and receipts and checkbooks and ledgers and planners.....UGH!
I'll be back soon with something more interesting.
Peace be with you....and me, too!!!