The Secret Meditation of I Will Survive

I made it to St. John's a little earlier than usual because the kids were cooking up breakfast to raise money for their trip this summer to Cuba. I also was curious to see if there had been any thinning of attendance, since some of the grumbling I'd heard was that maybe people WON'T show up.
Of course, they did. And of course, they should. Again, the unpleasantness of learning that the Rector is leaving pronto not withstanding, church and worship on Sunday should not be about the Rector. It should be about God. That's the point! In fact, I was so into that point that I kept saying "Thanks be to God", even during the gospel reading.
But where the priests become the "make or break" point in the service is during the sermon. If the person in the pulpit delivers a mealy-mouthed message of platitudes... then I will tune them out. Sometimes, I'll see if there's a Bible in the pew, and do a little "additional reading" around the the verses that had been culled out for the lectionary of the morning. If the sermon is hitting on things from the Scripture, and making a point... I'll hone in and be all ears. If the sermon has nothing to do with the readings of the morning... I'll get agitated.

Unless, there is good reason to stay away from the lessons because there is a bigger lesson that needs some teaching and reflecting. Such was the case with today's sermon. And, in something that rather surprised me, not only did Mtr. Phoebe acknowledged what has transpired this week... she did so reminding us that God is still with us even as we wonder, "Wha' happened?" She told the truth: that St. John's is lacking a center. Lots of people doing. Lots of good things springing up. But there is still secrecy, and closed-door sessions, and lousy communication. And a lack of a clear, defined eye in the winds of Hurricane Doing. Perhaps with the departure of our Rector, we can take the time to figure out who we are and what we want to be, and get ourselves organized.

And another pleasant surprise: as almost a nod to those of us of the "other" set in the church, Mtr. Phoebe recalled the words of the song I have dubbed "The Queer National Anthem"... Gloria Gaynor's disco hit "I Will Survive".

It took all the strength I had not to fall apart
Kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart
And I spent oh so many nights just feeling sorry for myself
I used to cry, but now I hold my head up high...

After the service, two of the gay gentlemen of the church got to talking and we laughed at how we'd never expected to hear Gloria Gaynor quoted from the pulpit! It was, for me, a moment of levity without being flip or unfeeling about the rockiness of the situation.

I took action on her words, and made sure the head verger and the Senior Warden knew that I was there to help them to build our community. The Sr. Warden said, "I may well end up calling on you." To which I replied, "That's why I am offering. I wouldn't offer if I wasn't sincere."

And so it is true: I will survive. As long as I know how to love I know I'll stay alive. And the same is true for the community of St. John's. Let's get to work.