My Picks for PIC

The community of St. John's is sitting on the edge of its pew as we receive letters, and bits and pieces of information, about the "unnamed person" who our Bishop will be luring to come be our priest-in-charge (aka PIC). We have been given a few clues about this person's identity:

• "He" is a "he";
• "He" is someone we'll "really like";
• "He" says his prayers and is pastoral;
• "He" is married with children (so we won't get any of that "gay" new thing happenin' in the church, and we won't have to worry about him marrying a parishioner).

And then, naturally, we have heard all about how this "He" will plant new families in the garden of Episcopal Church Growth, and water them so they produce lots of children, and he will love grandma and grandpa, too. This seems to be the standard line with all searches for Episcopal priests. It's about as predictable as hearing a beauty queen tell the pageant judges that she is for "world peace".

The important thing here is that the Bishop has said that rather than us going through a search process which would take 18-months to two years, the Bishop plans to select a person and then our vestry will give a thumbs up, and he'll be put in as "priest-in-charge" and ultimately made the rector.

So, who is this "unnamed" PIC? Inquiring minds (read everybody who attends services on a semi-regular basis) wants to know!! Since what we know is that "He" is a he, I thought I'd toss out names of male priests who I would like to see as the PIC.

Let's see.....

Men. Who I would "really like". Hmmmmm....

1. Rev. Jonathan Haggar (aka Mad Priest). I love his wit. I love his gospel outlook and no holds-bar approach to expressing it on his blog (Of Course, I Could Be Wrong) And the man needs to be rescued from England! Don't know if he has any kids, but I know there is a Mrs. Mad Priest.

2. Rt. Rev. Gene Robinson (aka the Bishop of New Hampshire)... but I'd doubt he'd give up his current gig to be our PIC at St. John's. Oh, and then there is that whole gay thing.... dammit!

3. The Very Rev. Mike Kinman (aka one of my college buddies). Well, OK... so he IS the dean of the cathedral in St. Louis. But that's so far from the oil-front property of the Gulf Coast! Mike loves baseball. We have decent COLLEGE baseball in Tallahassee. And he's a he. And he's married... with a child! Hmmm... do ya think it could be him?

4. Rev. Rich Weymouth (aka that really cool curate we had at Christ Church Exeter for a couple of years). I think he's a chaplain at a prep school in New England. He's married with kids, too. Oh, but I think they're grown up now. And Rich must be in his early 60s. This "He" is supposedly "young". (I hope that does not mean Rev. Doogie Howser!)

5. Rev. John Penman (aka Frdougal) but I doubt he'd want the job. And then there's that whole gay thing again.... geez, why does that keep tripping me up??

Is there any way to do age reversal on Fr. Lee Graham??