A Charlotte Progress Report

Good news! Charlotte had the second surgery and the margins are now clear. On to the next step toward wellness. Here's her report, and please continue to keep her in your prayers.

I saw Dr. Owens today, the radiation oncologist and we continued the conversation about treatment. When we saw her before Christmas, I did not know that I had bi-lateral cancer but she had assured me then, that if that were the case, she could do the treatments.​ She doesn't seem to think I will chemo either so we're 2 for 3 around that issue at the moment! I will see her on the 5th, the same day I see Dr. Medina and she will get me set up for the radiation procedures that will come sooner than later.
My blood pressure was higher than normal while in the office which was not a surprise but lets me know that I am not finding this process to be unstressful.​ I guess one of the pluses of this has been a greater awareness of what my body is doing and letting it be rather than telling myself that I am fine.(There is that word again!)
I am also on the verge of retiring and that reality is becoming more real as the interview process goes on for my successor. As I began to delete messages I have sent since 2005 when I started this work, it began to dawn on me that I was really doing this-I was really leaving my work at the Centers for Christian Studies and moving into the unknown. It feels good and also sad. I have so enjoyed working with the staff at All Souls so the leaving is bittersweet.​ But, it is right and the right time.
I learned an important thing last Saturday as I walked the Labyrinth during a Lenten Quiet Day we offered through the Centers. I found that when I looked ahead at the path before me, I became anxious and scared but when I put my eyes back down on the path and took one step at a time, I knew that all was well. Everything that happens on the labyrinth is a metaphor for life so it was a very important message to me both about my process with the cancer and with retirement and with everything else! In AA, we always talk about one step at a time and Saturday I knew the truth of that deep in my bones.
I am aware that there are some of you reading these journal entries who are going through medical issues of your own and I send you love and prayers in your journey. Being "sick" changes the way one looks at things, and certainly how one looks at life. At least it is doing that to me. I hope that there is goodness for you all as well as you deal with what is before you.
Love to you all. CDC